| Thankfull for this day |
[26 Nov 2009|08:51pm] |
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mood |
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 thankful |
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music |
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"epp op ork ah ah" |
] |
Went to my aunt's house. Ate the traditional feast and my fav is a fruit salad my uncle makes.
Played pool by myself. Man, I suck. Watched Jeff Dunham and his puppets. It was hilarious. Watched it with my cousins and brother. My other brother didn't want to go with us.
I made it through! After a few hours I get all anxious, but I didn't this time. We were there for 5 hours. My cousin in Denver is at the game tonight.
We played Cranium. It was so funny. having to draw with your eyes closed. We used to play games together but haven't in a long time. It was boys against girls. The guys won.
My relatives have a huge collection of vinyl, cds, and cassettes. And a pretty awesome stereo system. I was like whoa. Roger told me vinyl is coming back. And with better sound quality than a cd, is what he said. But I don't know for sure.
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| Thanksgiving |
[25 Nov 2009|03:50pm] |
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mood |
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 calm |
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music |
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"love or just a game" |
] |
Going to my aunt's house this year. It should be fun. They have a pool table.
So I need my meds. Deb called me this morning and told me Kim will bring my meds today. I'm going home today and spending the weekend at my folks. Or I might go back to the TL on Saturday.
Need to start Christmas shopping. I'm going to get my dad and brothers sweaters. Not sure what to get Mom. Maybe a gift basket at Bath and Body. I don't know. She's hard to buy for.
Darmaine called me again. She wanted to come over tomorrow morning. I told her I would be with my family. She's going to her sister's but didn't want to hang out there before the meal. I don't get her. She expects things to happen but I don't think she's ever been grateful before. She always has money problems. I don't get how she could go from one job to another. What about job security? I just don't get her lifestyle. And she expects me to be a friend to her? We hardly talked in HS. I just don't get it.
Anyway I hope everyone has a good Thanksgiving.
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| Another one |
[24 Nov 2009|03:38pm] |
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mood |
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 contemplative |
] |
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music |
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"express yourself hey hey" |
] |
Garnetta called in sick, so I met with Vi this afternoon. Vi is Melissa's mom. She told me that Melissa may have another bought of cancer. She had cancer in her uterus. They caught that one right away and ended up doing a partial hysterectomy. Now she might have breast cancer. Poor girl. I'll have to visit her sometime. She lives 2 blocks away.
Had to get another journal. I can't believe I've beem writing since I was 16. Crazy.
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| Break time |
[23 Nov 2009|04:01pm] |
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mood |
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 good |
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music |
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" |
] |
I was out taking a break and Lois said to pick up the cig butts, so I did.
Then Delores told me it's Rex's job to pick up the cigs and thanked me for picking them up. I hope Rex keeps the back area clean.
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| Movie |
[22 Nov 2009|02:36pm] |
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mood |
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 groggy |
] |
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music |
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"all my life I'll testify" |
] |
The movie was pretty good. I didn't fidget at all. yay I think I'm getting better. The movie was touching.
After we dropped Barb off at Milton Towers, we went to Just For Me. I had to give directions. Mom and her friend hadn't been there before. I found a purse I like but it probably is expensive. The place is full of purses and jewelry and some clothes.
We're going to my aunt's house for Thanksgiving.
Reading: Jane Eyre
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| The mall |
[21 Nov 2009|10:25am] |
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mood |
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 sleepy |
] |
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music |
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"how does the story end" |
] |
Yesterday several of us from the TL went to the mall for about an hour. After I made a purchase at Target, I saw E's mom and walked over. It was good to see Elena. She said to call her sometime, so I will. I miss talking to her. I saw her parents. They were happy to see me too. I've known them for years.
Going to a movie this afternoon at the Sleep Inn. The Secrets of Jonathon Sperry. Going with mom and a couple people she works with.
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| Bus ride |
[19 Nov 2009|12:17pm] |
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mood |
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calm |
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music |
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"tell me I'm the only one" |
] |
Yesterday the bus was driving on Broadway to take me home. I look out at the car beside the bus and saw Garnetta driving. I'll have to tell her I saw her.
Delores told me she appreciates me volunteering. She said nothing would get done if I wasn't there. It made me feel good, but I can't do it forever.
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| Not much |
[18 Nov 2009|04:44pm] |
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mood |
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 disappointed |
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music |
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"this masquerade is getting older" |
] |
Not much is new with me. I hope Laurie remembers to get me a ticket for the Singing Christmas tree. I would have done it but I got so anxious last year.
One day I didn't smoke til 2 pm. And I felt a lot better. My goal is to be tobacco free by my birthday next year. I don't want to waste my money on cigarettes. Even though my dad buys them for me because I can't afford it.
I told Garnetta that my mom wants me to go to Palau and stop taking my meds. It's like my mom hasn't accepted the fact that I'm mentally ill. She doesn't understand me anymore. Garnetta said I'm doing much better than I was. When I had an episode at Oakwood Ct. and called the police on myself, I was court ordered to 3C, the psych ward. If I stop taking the meds I might relapse. I haven't had a panic attack since I started taking Lexapro. Things are going well and don't want to be like how I was. I'm a totally different person from all the things I've gone through. I'm strong and am perservering through the ups and downs. What won't kill me will make me stronger. It's made me appreciate life that much more.
Reading: The Last Song by Nicholas Sparks
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| Marketplace |
[10 Nov 2009|03:42pm] |
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mood |
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 content |
] |
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music |
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"they call me the space cowboy" |
] |
Garnetta and I walked out of the store and my dad goes by in the truck. And Tille, Garnetta's SO, was right behind my dad. It was a cool coincident.
Bought more chocolate :)
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| Harry Potter |
[07 Nov 2009|09:37pm] |
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mood |
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 awake |
] |
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music |
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"all my life I'll testify" |
] |
Just got home from the movie. My bro gave us passes to it. Mom and I saw the Half-Blood Prince. It was kind of disappointing. At least we didn't have to pay.
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| Eating |
[05 Nov 2009|01:26pm] |
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mood |
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calm |
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music |
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"beauty for ashes" |
] |
I've been eating a lot lately. Fruit or chocolate. whatever is there. It's made me gain about 3 pounds. I can sense when I lose weight.
I was just thinking of Sept 11th. Before it happened I sensed something big was going to happen. Sometimes I have thoughts that come true. One time, I just knew I'd get my pic taken on a bridge and that came true. My pic appeared in the newspaper. I took a pic of myself and saw my aura. It's gold colored. Not sure what that means. Just random odd things that happen to me.
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| Cleaning |
[04 Nov 2009|12:39pm] |
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mood |
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 blah |
] |
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music |
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"dude looks like a lady" |
] |
Was up til midnight cleaning my bathroom. Still have the tub to clean. Put all my summer clothes into the tubs I bought. Still have to organize my closet. I have clothes and other junk mail and crap to go through.
I felt so grown up yesterday. I bought myself a small coffee maker. :)
I cant't believe it's November. Where did the time go??
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| Clothes |
[02 Nov 2009|04:12pm] |
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mood |
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 tired |
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music |
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"it's only in my dreams" |
] |
I have way too many clothes. I seriously need to get my closet organized and seperate the summer and winter clothes. So, I'll need to get a few tubs from Wal-mart.
Supposed to be nice this week. 40's and 50's.
Rent due tomorrow and going to Midcontinent to pay that bill.
Started getting a panic attack about half way during my shift at the store. I managed to pull through and finished what I started. Delores was home sick. I won't be going to work on Wednesday. It's grocery group that day.
Just checked Oak Park theater's lineup. The 6th Harry Potter is playing. Hopefully, I'll get my mom to go with me. I'd like to see it.
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| New resident |
[31 Oct 2009|07:13pm] |
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mood |
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 hungry |
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music |
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"i ain't got no crystal ball" |
] |
There's a new resident at the TL. He's in his 50's I think. His name is Roger. Guess he needs help to feel better. That's what we're all there for. He took my previous room after they tucked me in a single room. And now Izzy shares a room with Mary. So many people come and go.
Darin showed up at community dinner. He moved with his family to CA, but came back because all his stuff is here. We reminisced about burger joints in CA: In and Out, Carl's Jr, and Jack in the box, I'd give anything to have a double double animal style right now. They're sooo good, everything is fresh.
I have to remember to eat lunch at noon or before. So I can my one med on an empty stomach.
I'm going to buy a coffee maker.
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| Coffee |
[20 Oct 2009|03:07pm] |
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mood |
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 hopeful |
] |
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music |
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"why do we crucify ourselves" |
] |
Been trying coffee to get me awake. I wake up and tire so easily these days. Unfortunately, the coffee doesn't help.
I don't want to volunteer anymore. But it gets me out of the house so I guess I'll stick with it. I plan on talking to Sue Robb in December and hopefully start working next year. A new year a new beginning. Just hope I can handle it.
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| What? |
[16 Oct 2009|01:08pm] |
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mood |
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 silly |
] |
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music |
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" |
] |
Women speak 30,000 times a day. Men 15,000 times.
A woman said to her husband it's because we have to repeat everything we say. And her husband looks at her and says "what?"
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| Snow |
[15 Oct 2009|11:18am] |
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mood |
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 cold |
] |
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music |
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"livin it up when i'm going down" |
] |
We got our first snow fall the other night. Now everything is wet.
It's drizzling right now, a mix of snow and rain. Maybe the community dinner will be cancelled.
Reading Eating Heaven by Jennie Shortridge
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| Snow |
[09 Oct 2009|01:14pm] |
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mood |
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tired |
] |
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music |
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"give him all your soul" |
] |
We got some snow but it wasn't much. On the news at noon, somebody sent in a pic of a tornado over a lake.
I don't know why I've been so tired lately. Maybe I'll start drinking coffee in the mornings.
Michelle brought a pair of pants. Mary tried them on, but they didn't fit her. Michelle offered it to me, it fit. :)
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| Back to the grind |
[05 Oct 2009|08:27pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 lethargic |
] |
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music |
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"if you say everything you are" |
] |
Did a good job at work. Delores was pleased. I went through a whole box to hang sweatshirts. And hung all the coats.
Found Grace Livingston Hill books that I haven't read yet. I paid 2.01 for them. I usually would get it free, she just gave me a deep discount. I'll take what I can get.
Told Delores I wouldn't be in on Wednesday. That's grocery group day.
So far no snow here, but a lot of drizzling rain.
My ride was early both times.
It feels like I had lab a long time ago when I had it this morning. Probably because I woke up at 7 am.
Reading The Grey King by Susan Cooper.
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| Nooooooooooooo |
[04 Oct 2009|03:11pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 grumpy |
] |
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music |
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"we got only 4 minutes to save the world" |
] |
Snow prediced for tomorrow and tuesday and wednesday. Tell me it isn't so.
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midnight_river's journal